On this episode of Total Bellas, the Bella Twins finally make their comeback in the place where it all started: the wrestling ring. However, before making it to their comeback episode of Monday Night Raw, the sisters had to deal with plenty of drama which should surprise no one who’s been following their reality TV career.
First came the drama that began on last week’s episode, namely Nicole’s impromptu lunch date with her former Dancing with the Stars partner, Artem. Since the couple apparently shared amazing chemistry on the dance floor, fans would naturally wonder if the newly single Nicole would take advantage of the alone time with her former ballroom buddy.
However, it appears that Nicole’s only motive was an altruistic one, since she only asked Artem for his help in making a lifelong dream come true for her mother, Kathy. Apparently, the Bella matriarch thinks of herself as a ballroom diva when texting her daughters after a few too many drinks. So, Nicole thought it might be nice to make her mom’s ballroom dream a reality, and to choreograph a performance for Kathy, Nicole, and Artem to do together. While I believe that Nicole’s intentions were good in planning this performance, I can’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if her mother had been embarrassed by something that she only found achievable while being drunk. I guess we won’t ever know the answer because Kathy was apparently delighted by Nicole’s plan.
Another family member seemed to have a problem with it though…Nicole’s sister, Brie.
It wasn’t Nicole’s dream of turning their mother into a ballroom ballerina that disturbed Brie, but the thought of Nicole reuniting with and dancing with Artem.
During Nicole’s time on Dancing with the Stars social media platforms were abuzz with rumors concerning Nicole’s cheating on her then boyfriend John Cena. Brie was concerned that Nicole’s being seen with Artem so soon after her breakup would be damaging to the image that the sisters have so carefully cultivated.
Furthermore, the powers that be at WWE felt that Nicole’s appearing to rebound so soon might be damaging to the WWE’s recent women’s empowerment movement. However, I say that Nicole is single now, and should be completely free to date whomever she wants without the input of either her fans or the company for which she works. I am fully aware that that is generally not how the world works, so I’m using this platform to encourage people to allow celebrities to live their own lives and focus on our own rather than theirs for once!
Obviously Brie was extremely brand-conscious during this episode, because she not only became upset with Nicole for the possible tarnishing of their brand, but began to encourage her husband Daniel Bryan to develop his own.
We all know that wrestlers careers can’t last forever, and particularly with Daniel’s recent health issues one can’t blame Brie for wondering what her husband will do once his career comes to an end, but I wonder if she ever stopped to consider her husband’s personality before going on her brand building crusade.
Anyone who has taken even a slight interest in Daniel Bryan over the years knows that he is aggressively opposed to the rampant consumerism which he believes dominates our society. So it’s hard to imagine why his own wife thought that he would enjoy having a second career as a spokesperson for products such as flannel shirts or beard oil which were suggested by the brand manager that Brie hired. Finally, Brie seemed to receive Daniel’s message loud and clear, because she and her brand manager came up with the idea that Daniel should become a spokesperson for “Bryan’s Hoes” a line of garden hose which uses only recycled materials in its production.
Daniel seems amenable to the idea so, look for “Bryan’s Hoes” coming soon to a retailer near you, and join us next week for the next Total Bellas summary and color commentary.
