AEW Dynamite tonight comes to us from the Wintrust Arena in Chicago, Illinois. After last week drawing 832,000 & 0.30 in the 18-49 demo.

There are rumors of Punk appearing tonight.

*****

The Gunns vs the Hardys

Backstory: Gunns challenged the Hardys last week

The winner here earns a contract for the right to earn a contract to control somebody’s contract.

Matt shouted ‘delete’ before we got going.  So all that’s left to complete the 2023 version of the act is for Jeff to trip and fall.

Matt backed Austin to the corner, arm-wringer, Jeff in to a big pop, couple double-team hip tosses, suplex, poetry in motion, Jeff missed a splash in the corner, killed Austin with whisper in the wind but was hit from behind by Colten after standing still a while in the ropes.

Heavy booing as Colten stomped away then got two via suplex.

Cutting off the tag, he brought his brother back in to grab a headlock, Jeff low-bridged Austin out through the ropes, hit a jawbreaker to Colten, the Gunns desperately trying to stop the tag.

Jeff made the dive, Matt in, series of lariats, side effect, Colten propelled outside, ‘delete’ x many, Twist of Fate, Colten put his brother’s foot on the ropes.

To more boos.

Then snapped Matt across the top rope; Austin got two with his feet on the ropes, missed a Fameasser, blocked Twist of Fate, Colten in, twisting ddt, Jeff broke up the pin.

Threw shots to both Gunns, Manhattan drops too, then a double ddt to take out both.  Before hitting a double legdrop to the ‘yambags’.  Colten kept blocking Twist of Fate but was hit with what looked completely different yet the announcers called it Twist of Fate anyway.

Jay White shoved Jeff off the top as he was readying a Swanton – into 3:10 to Yuma, thankfully the team who weren’t wrestling thirty years ago won.

Bullet Club Gold then went to work: Bladerunner to Matt, Jeff hit with Left Hand of God with a handful of coins.  Ricky Starks hit the ring far too late and got his ass kicked four-on-one, until FTR hit the scene to a HUGE pop and chants of ‘FTR’.

Loud ‘CM Punk’ chants, he finally hit the ring with no music, Juice scrambled out of the GTS and fell through the ropes to escape.

Guessing we might have an eight-man Saturday.

Punk took the mic to challenge the heels to a match on Collision – ‘Im a Collision guy, I’m not even supposed to be here’.  His music then played with the crowd amped.

And thankfully Jay White isn’t stuck feuding with the Hardys.  And pairing Ricky Starks with Punk and co. does him a lot of good after being out in the cold.

A nothing opener with a heated post-match angle to setup Saturday’s show.  Crowd hot for everything, including the Hardys whose popularity baffles yours truly.  Though they did look better here than in recent performances.

Winner: the Gunns

Video package pushing the Jarrett/Briscoe match.

Jeff Jarrett vs Mark Briscoe, Concession Stand Brawl

Backstory: The pair have been feuding on Rampage, Jarrett challenged Briscoe to this on Collision

Already backstage, the ref asked both guys if they were ready and we got started.  Wouldn’t want to win this if I were either of these two – the last guy to win a wild brawl through the arena hasn’t been seen in a month.

They beat each other through the corridor using random weapons, condiments and so on.  Within about two minutes Karen Jarrett sprayed Briscoe with mustard.  We’re certainly getting our fill of fifty-year-olds on the show so far.

Briscoe climbed a ladder but is dumb as hell so waited for a hooded man to shove him off through some tables.  Revealed as Sonjay Dutt.  That’s two people interfering within five minutes.  This is basically Jeff Jarrett publicly masturbating and showing he’s learned nothing from his many failed runs.

Break.  How many more will interfere?  Stay tuned to find out!

They’d worked their way to ringside during the ads.  Jarrett, Dutt and Jay Lethal were beating Briscoe three-on-one.  But the sides were ‘evened’ as another fifty(plus?)-year-old appeared to even the odds – ‘Papa Briscoe’ unveiling himself at ringside (why was he just watching his son get beaten up till then?), planting Lethal through a table and chasing Karen away.

Briscoe looked for Jay Driller.  But the interference wasn’t over!  Satnam Singh hit him with a chokeslam, a bunch of lower card guys got beaten up until the Lucha Bros hit uno, dos, tres kicks and Fenix hit a splash to a huge pop to take the big man out.

Briscoe rolled Jarrett up to win.

We could’ve just had a Lucha Bros match instead.  The team that had one of the best moments in company history in the same city in 2021.

I know I give Jeff Jarrett a hard time; in his defense, he wasn’t just hired to wrestle.  He was also brought in to help with ticket sale… oh.

Between Jericho/Strong, AitA & this – wild brawls through the arena are becoming another thing AEW does too often.

A waste of tv time.

Winner: Mark Briscoe

They replayed Eddie Kingston returning in last week’s main event and all the other goings on there.

Cut to Mox, along with the BCC, Don Callis and Konosuke Takeshita, who Moxley called ‘tall, dark and sexy’, then mentioned ‘the shooter’ Shota Umino.  Together they’re a hell of a team: he challenged the Elite to a 5-on-5 at Forbidden Door.

Then Danielson addressed Okada.  As far as Danielson can tell, Okada’s not even here yet.  It doesn’t surprise him because it’ll be clear when they get in the ring together that Okada’s an ‘amateur’.

Danielson’s going to call-out Okada later and if he doesn’t answer, he’s a ‘coward and an amateur’.

This is vintage AEW so far, just whizzing through segments without a pause.

Ten-man should be fun anyway.  Eddie and Ibushi?  Hopefully Callis’ involvement with the BCC helps them be proper heels amid Wild Thing and all that.

*****

Recap of Collision.

Chris Jericho, Sammy Guevara & Minoru Suzuki vs Action Andretti, Darius Martin & AR Fox

Backstory: After a verbal spat last week, Jericho wanted to team with Sammy to remind him who his boss is

On the subject of heels and theme music, Judas brought Jericho and Sammy to the ring.  Then of course Kaze ni nare played.  Reuniting the trio who kicked things off at last year’s Forbidden Door in one of my two favorite matches from the show.

While the ‘babyfaces’ came out as one to Andretti’s theme and no reaction.  These dudes are not in a good spot here.  There’s no way Suzuki’s getting booed for a start.

Sammy and Andretti set things off – lockup, headlock, Sammy whipped in, rebounding to knock Andretti down, missing a pump kick, rolling under an Andretti one, both looked for a thrust kick – stalemate.

Suzuki in – Guevara not tagging the Ocho – crowd chanting for Suzuki, he and Darius got straight to chopping, the vet rocked the youngster with wicked forearms, Jericho in too, double shoulder tackle, the pair then launched the Sex Gods pose – hilarious and greatly entertaining, but we’re back to the heels? question.

Fox in, Jericho to the corner, running lariat, skin-the-cat dropkick, thrust kick, Sammy hit Fox from the apron with Aubrey (properly for once) distracted.

Ads.  This is certainly a hot crowd so far, living up to Chicago’s rep.

Fox and Sammy down, making the crawl, Jericho and Andretti in, flying forearm, chops, Andretti telegraphed a backdrop, stiff chops from the Ocho, Andretti ducked a lariat then flew through the ropes to hit Sammy via tope.  Before heading back in to shotgun dropkick Jericho to the corner, the vet avoided a split leg, Suzuki grabbed the choke, Darius broke it and was BOOED.

‘You F’d up!’

Suzuki smashed Darius, piledriver ready on Andretti, Darius stopped it, Sammy hit a double cutter, was taken out by Fox dropkick, Jericho sent Fox to the apron, Fox hit his backward senton to the others at ringside, Andretti got nearly three via rollup, hit a springboard kick to the face, running shooting star, Jericho kicked out.

Darius in, lariat to Jericho, Sammy hit a Spanish fly, Fox a thrust kick and corkscrew brainbuster, Suzuki dropstepped behind (it’s crazy how well he moves considering his age and the wars he’s been in), choke, Gotch-style piledriver, Andretti hit him via thrust kick, was taken out via Codebreaker, Darius took Jericho out via out-to-in flatliner, two only.

Then hit a low kick to the face before coming off the top right into the Walls and another big pop, Suzuki had Fox in an ankle lock outside as Darius tapped.

A very fun and wild match with massively confusing booking.  Jericho and Suzuki were heels who weren’t remotely heels, while Sammy took some heelish cheap shots amid desperately trying to become a babyface.

Though they did give all three babyfaces a chance to shine here.

Post-match, Renee hit the ring to interview Jericho.  She asked him about Sting.  Jericho snatched the mic to say it was a ‘monumental moment in pro wrestling history, everyone was so excited… except for me’.  Because Jericho knows how selfish and egotistical Sting is, he only shows up wherever the money is – ‘you’re a whore!’.

‘Le Suzuki Gods’ challenged Sting, Darby and TBA for a six-man at Forbidden Door.  The Ocho continued to rant until the snow fell and all that, Sting and Darby marching to the ring.  Another big pop.

Sting shrieked a couple times before pausing face-to-face with Jericho to a few ‘Holy S’ chants.  He asked why Jericho was so uptight.  They had a ‘moment’ last week but ‘I need some time with you’ – so he and Darby accepted ‘your lame challenge’.

Darby took the mic to say Jericho had a lot of enemies – ‘we got the guy for Sunday’ – Jericho demanded to know who.  Allin said he’d find out on Collision.  To a few boos.

They’re doing a nice job doing what they failed to do Saturday and building up the second Collision show.

Winner: Chris Jericho, Sammy Guevara & Minoru Suzuki

The Blind Tag Eliminator drawing – Schiavone and RJ City – it is indeed basically Battle Bowl.  They drew it Rumble style, reacted to the names, but didn’t tell us who any of the guys were.

We’ll have to find out next week when it starts.

This might have been fun at the division’s zenith – Dax and Matt Jackson, Fenix and Nick and etc and etc.  But the tag scene’s on life support and doesn’t need this.

It needs proper teams wrestling regularly on television in tag matches that are entertaining and have stories.

*****

The Elite backstage – Page addressed Mox’s challenge (boos could be heard from the crowd but not overwhelmingly, alongside a smattering of CM Punk chants), Omega said they ‘found a friend in an unexpected place’ as Eddie Kingston entered to say they weren’t friends but he’d team with them as long as he could pick the fifth guy since he doesn’t fully trust them.

The Elite agreed.

*****

Adam Cole out to yet another big pop as they replayed the finish to last week’s match with MJF.

Basking in loud chants, he took the mic to ‘give the devil his due’ – Max gave him one of the toughest matches of his career last week.  Cole did everything he could to win, but didn’t.

‘However, MJF didn’t win either’.

It was smart for MJF to turn down five more minutes but also cowardly.  Max has never beaten him – so he demanded MJF come out to talk about ‘my rematch’.

MJF got one of the biggest pops of the night the second his music hit.  Possibly only behind Punk.  Though was fairly loudly booed too as he hit the ring.  Where he immediately heeled on the crowd to try to remedy the mixed response.

Getting the desired effect via ‘STFU’ & ‘You suck’ chants.

MJF congratulated Cole on the ‘Panama Playboy’ coming back out ‘to play’.  But he’s worried about Cole’s head injuries, last week ‘you lost track of time’ and had the time not run out ‘I had you beat’ (just tremendous heel work).

‘Bullsh**’ chants from the crowd.

Since Max cares about Cole’s ‘health and wellbeing, I’m gonna have to say… no’.

Cole was waiting for that response, threatening to ‘whup’ Max right here.  Schiavone intervened – both guys yelled ‘shutup Schiavone’ simultaneously (AEW just don’t know when to leave the comedy alone).  Tony revealed that the two names he drew earlier in the tag tournament were these two.

Both guys went nuts.

I’m a little higher on that if it’s involving some of the bigger stars.  We’ll see.

Hiroshi Tanahashi appeared on the screen via pre-shot promo to call MJF – in English – a ‘coward’ and vow to show the strength of ‘the Ace’.  Max started ranting about what Tony Khan was trying to pull until Cole baited Max into accepting the match with Tanahashi – starting a ‘coward’ chant.

Like that mixing of the two feuds.  That was clever.

‘Let me leave you with this – good luck partner’ said Cole as he departed.  Excalibur emphasized that Cole had once again manipulated Max into doing something he didn’t want to.

A pretty good follow-up to last week as they put this feud on the slow burner.

*****

The Owen Hart brackets were announced:

Men – 1^st side: Satoshi Kojima vs CM Punk; Roderick Strong vs Samoa Joe

2^nd side: Dustin Rhodes vs Will Hobbs; Juice Robinson vs Ricky Starks

Women – 1^st side: Britt Baker vs Ruby Soho (Going out on a limb and predicting Soho wins after interference); Anna Jay vs Skye Blue

2^nd side: Nyla Rose vs Willow Nightingale; Athena vs Billie Starkz

Well, there’s at least one truly big name for each sex.  And clearly we’re getting Punk vs Joe – *rubs hands together*.

Outside of that it’s a little underwhelming.  If they’re going to go with young talents like Hobbs and Willow winning the thing, I’m hoping they’ll do better than they did last year emphasizing the win and using it as a means to raise the winners up the card.

*****

Orange Cassidy & Katsuyori Shibata vs Zack Sabre Jr & Daniel Garcia

Backstory: Sabre challenged Cassidy last week, Garcia asked where Shibata was, Cassidy promised he’d be here for this tag

They recapped Cassidy and Shibata’s history and mutual respect.  Shibata still has the NJPW logo on his video – sure I’d heard he’d left the company, maybe it was just running the Dojo?

The heels argued on their way down the ramp.

Shibata and Zack started off to a lockup and ‘Holy S’ chants.  Down to the mat they wrestled for the advantage, Sabre looking for a triangle, Shibata wrestled free, missed a kick, the two went chest-to-chest, all four guys in until the ref ordered Cassidy and Garcia back out.

Bringing the break.  Must be the ref’s birthday since he was made to look competent.

Sabre with Shibata in a headlock, the two again wrestled fluidly in and out of the hold, Shibata bridged free, Sabre looked for a cobra twist, Shibata immediately wrestled out, Sabre snagged a flying octopus, Shibata reversed into an ankle lock – the sort of wrestling you never see in the US.

Garcia in, Shibata slugged him to the mat, the youngster got a single shot in, Shibata really sold his head and tagged Cassidy.  Garcia did his dumb dancing; Cassidy mimicked it then bagged a rollup when Garcia charged in.

Garcia got a waistlock, Cassidy got the pockets, kicked his way free and dropkicked Garcia to the mat.  Garcia bailed to tag Sabre.  ‘Come on d***head!’ –  he seems fond of that phrase.

Cassidy went for the kicks, Sabre stopped it quickly, they kept targeting the other’s arm, Sabre was sent to the mat but popped up to snap Cassidy down via his shoulder and twist his boot on the joint.

Garcia back in.  Suplex, pin, two.  He then targeted Cassidy’s knees before quickly tagging Sabre back in, the pair working well now, targeting all of Cassidy’s limbs and knocking Shibata off the apron.

Cassidy too was then flung outside, clutching his knee as we entered the match’s second break.

Zack continued to work over Cassidy: front guillotine, suplex attempt, Cassidy stundogged his way free, Shibata in, big boot, rapid forearms, snapmare, kick to the spine, Garcia tried to interfere and was knocked down on the apron.

Sabre hit a kick to the arm, Garcia tagged in and began targeting the limb with repeated kicks, Shibata shook it off to launch forearms and uppercuts.  Another snapmare/spine kick combo, Cassidy in, he and Shibata hit the kicks together until Sabre tried to sneak in and both heels were smacked with thrust kicks as the faces went to work with shots in the corner and cross-over running dropkicks.

Orange took out Sabre via tope, Shibata hit another dropkick in the corner to Garcia and a float-over suplex for two.  Garcia rolled through into the Dragon Tamer, Shibata bridged up to release the pressure then reversed it, Sabre came in to stomp his teammate free.

Cassidy hit a dropkick to Sabre, Garcia threw a couple blows, Shibata shook them off, big pumpkick, sleeper, Sabre again tried to intervene, Shibata held Garcia in place as Orange went for the Punch, Garcia ducked, Shibata ate the Punch and the pin after Garcia rolled him up.

A long match through two breaks.  There was some very good and very different action here, just could’ve been a little shorter.  Especially on a show where everything else felt crammed in.

All four guys then politely looked at and held onto the belt without any violence, until Cassidy angrily wrenched it away from Shibata and stormed up the ramp.

My apologies, the chain wrestling here was so slick and so foreign to me that I didn’t do the best job covering it.

Winner: Daniel Garcia & Zack Sabre Jr

Alex Marvez backstage.  He caught Will Ospreay arriving.  The Englishman’s used to performing in ‘civilized countries’ like Britain and Japan.  Yet, he’s been getting threats from Canadian fans, so demanded AEW provide extra security.

As Callis entered to promise ‘special security’.  Ospreay wondered what the catch was, Callis said he just wanted to see a ‘fair fight’ on Sunday.

Ospreay came off as a total star here.  Poised and comfortable in the sort of segment he’s never normally tasked with.  Demanding attention and making himself seem a big deal.

Now, if that’s the only appearance he makes, then why did he turn up?  (It was indeed, though he is wrestling on Rampage)

*****

Toni Storm promo package sarcastically putting over Willow Nightingale as representing the people, people Toni doesn’t care about.  Nightingale said she doesn’t like much about Storm but does respect her ‘fight’.

While Storm doesn’t care if people respect her attitude.  Willow shouldn’t worry about that, she should worry about what’ll happen to her.

Storm was excellent here.  Coming off as a totally arrogant heel who looked down her nose at everyone else without overacting.  And that match should be great fun if we can do without the Outcast Effect for a night.

Is Mercedes’ ankle well enough for her to prevent a post-match beatdown?  Perhaps Jamie Hayter will return instead.

Kris Statlander vs Taya Valkyrie, TBS Title

Backstory: Taya’s been watching Kris’ defenses & looking angry

So it seems this is our in-ring main event.  With Danielson and Okada’s face-off to follow.

Taya’s now dressed in black so that and a few scowls are the entire heel turn.  Who says AEW can’t tell stories!?

The announcers told us that Valkyrie resented Statlander for winning the title the way she did.  Because neither’s had any opportunity to tell the story themselves.

An aggressive Taya went after the champ with lariats, Statlander avoided all then chopped and slapped the challenger in the corner before wailing away with rights.  Until being caught with an open hand slap after charging in.

Another, then one to the chest; the champion responded as they goaded one another, Statlander hit a legsweep then a handstand-legdrop, nice sequence.

Valkyrie hit a brutal knee strike, missed a charge and ended up outside, where Statlander hit a thrust kick from the apron then her rear-back moonsault down to the floor.

Hate seeing her do stuff like that after her knee injuries.

She was distracted by the crowd chanting her name and dropkicked off the apron to bring the break.

Both down in the middle, to their knees then their feet, Statlander landed rights, uppercut in the corner, running knee, falcon arrow, kickout at two.  Then blocked a Valkyrie suplex until being dragged up into a bearhug/double underhook into a sitdown slam landing onto her ass/spine which looked great (the slam, to be clear).  Count of two.

The crowd chanted for the champ as she avoided a kick and got two via rollup then again via lariat.  But was blasted by a Valkyrie spear and elbowed in the corner before Taya hit a German suplex while sliding under the ropes with Statlander perched on the second.

The crowd applauded that one despite Taya being the heel.  As she headed upstairs, was cut off, superplex ready, hit – such a hard landing, brutal – then Wednesday Night Fever (Tombstone) as the champion retained.

This match had what a lot of women’s matches in AEW lack – intensity.  It wasn’t running from spot to spot, it wasn’t someone pumping their arms a million times before hitting the ropes and there wasn’t groan-inducing interference – it was hard-hitting fight with some very nice moves.

And deserved more than the time it got – both tonight and in weeks prior.  If this is a one-off, it’s a waste.

Winner: Kris Statlander

The show was now in such a rush that Eddie Kingston was already in the ring, to loud chants of his name.  Light boos as he mentioned the Elite.  Kingston said ‘they’re cute, they’re good guys I guess’ while smiling, clearly reveling in stirring the pot.

But there’ve been a lot of things he doesn’t like or agree with.  Including his ‘homeboy’ who doesn’t like him teaming with the Bucks.  But he just hates Claudio so much he has no choice.  As Moxley appeared in the crowd – no music – he hit the ring and got right in Eddie’s face:

‘You know how this goes – if they stand behind you protect them, if they stand beside you, respect them, if they stand against you… destroy them’.  Then said Kingston had drawn a line.  Eddie quickly insisted that Moxley drew it by linking up with ‘that scumbag’.  He loves Mox, Mox is his brother, but Mox decided to team with Claudio.

More ‘Eddie’ chants.

Before he then nonchalantly announced Tomohiro Ishii as the fifth member of the Elite’s team.  Ishii appeared as the BCC hit Kingston from behind – Danielson, Yuta and Claudio beating down Eddie and Ishii.

As Danielson grabbed a mic to cut-off ‘Okada’ chants.  Danielson was just threatening to ‘stomp Ishii’s face in’ when the coin dropped and maybe my favorite theme in wrestling played to an enormous pop.

He and Danielson stood face-to-face in the middle of the ring for a long time, Yuta attacked from behind, holding Okada in place for the busaiku knee, Okada moved, Yuta ate it, Danielson ducked and fled to avoid a Rainmaker.

As the crowd loudly chanted Okada’s name once more.  He made Danielson watch as he walloped Yuta with it instead.  The crowd’s reaction here did more to put Okada across to any casual fans than any promo or package could’ve.

His music played and he held his arms out in the Rainmaker pose as if beckoning Danielson to come get some as the show ended.

The only question being, where did Mox and Kingston go?

_________________________________________________________________________

Next Collision:

• CM Punk, FTR & Ricky Starks vs Bullet Club Gold & the Gunns
• Darby and Sting will name their partner for Forbidden Door
• Swerve Strickland vs Hiroshi Tanahashi
• Christian Cage addresses the TNT Title
• Nyla Rose vs Willow Nightingale (Owen Hart tourney)
• Brody King vs Andrade El Idolo

Added to Forbidden Door:

• Orange Cassidy vs Katsuyori Shibata vs Daniel Garcia vs Zack Sabre Jr (Int’nl Title)
• Toni Storm vs Willow Nightingale (AEW Women’s Title)
• CM Punk vs Satoshi Kojima
• Chris Jericho, Sammy Guevara & Minoru Suzuki vs Sting, Darby Allin & TBA
• Young Bucks, Hangman Page, Eddie Kingston & Tomohiro Ishii vs Jon Moxley, Claudio Castagnoli, Wheeler Yuta, Konosuke Takeshita & Shota Umino

Thumbs Up/Down

• Fun to see the NJPW guys finally hit the scene
• Great crowd – lively atmosphere making most guys felt like stars
• Good build for Collision
• Le Suzuki Gods vs Action & Co.
• Toni Storm’s promo work
• Taya vs Statlander
• The Elite and CM Punk can seemingly be in the same arena since they’re both on Forbidden Door – it’s a start at least
• Cole getting the better of MJF again

 *****

• A continuing problem – too many Attitude Era guys on a show started to be a refreshing alternative
• Just waaaay too busy, nothing was given a second to really sink in. With about thirty mins left (including ads) there was still a TBS title match, an Eddie Kingston promo and partner reveal, and a Danielson/Okada face-fo-face to squeeze in.  And in fact, the last two got a combined seven minutes.
• In contrast to Okada/Danielson, the build for Omega/Ospreay was lacklustre at best

Appreciate you reading.  Have a good week.