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Smackdown TV report for 08/03/2013

The Smack is being laid Down for us tonight in Houston Texas. Heavyweight champion Alberto Del Rio is the first man to the ring. Alberto wants to thank us for NOTHING.

He claims we never supported him when he was champion before. Alberto does however, want to thank SmackDown GM Vickie Guererro. Vickie gave Alberto the same deal Brad Maddox on Raw; she let him choose his own opponent. Del Rio said his first choice was to face the beast, Brock Lesnar, but unfortunately Brock already has a match at SummerSlam.

Then Alberto was going to pick Houston’s own, Booker T! But then he remembered that Booker, like Houston, was always a disappointment. So Alberto decided to pick his personal ring announcer, Ricardo Rodriguez!

Vickie comes out and she’s not amused. Vickie feels Alberto has been disrespectful to her by not making a serious choice. Alberto says he meant no disrespect and says he wants to fight the Brooklyn Brawler instead. Vickie was prepared for Alberto to pull something like this, and has already decided that tonight’s main event will be a 3 way match to determine who will face Alberto for the World title at SummerSlam. The three participants for tonight’s main event will be RVD, Christian, and Randy Orton.

Commercial

Match #1: Jack Swagger versus Cody Rhodes.

Zeb Coulter grabs the mic and gets ready to berate the people of Houston when he and Swagger are attacked by Cody Rhodes. Cody lands several punches including one delivered up from the mat to Swagger’s chin.

Swagger takes Cody down with an overhead throw and follows up with a series of knees to the gut. Swagger knocks Cody down with a running clothesline and then wraps his arms up behind his back. Cody escapes with an elbow strike and then lands a punch.

Cody goes for the Beautiful Disaster kick but Swagger ducks under it and counters with a Swagger bomb. Swagger lands a couple punches and picks Cody up for a gutwrench powerbomb, but Cody slides out and rolls Swagger up for the win!

After the match Josh Matthews interviews Cody. Cody tells us that he understands why Damien betrayed him at Money in the Bank, and he even admits he probably would have done the same thing. But Cody says he had grown tired of Damien’s arrogance, and that’s why he threw his briefcase into the Gulf of Mexico. Just then, Damien blindsides Cody and slams his head repeatedly into the wall.

Match #2: Sin Cara versus Big E Langston.

Sin Cara lands a kick and a punch before being flattened by a Big E shoulder block. Sin Cara hits Big E with a dropkick and goes for a cover. Big E kicks out and backdrops Sin Cara. Big E puts Sin Cara in a headlock but Sin Cara escapes after landing a few knee strikes.

Big E knock Sin Cara down with a clothesline and then hits him with a pair of clubbing blows to the back of the head. Big E puts Sin Cara in an abdominal stretch. Sin Cara gets out and lands a couple kicks to the head. Sin Cara goes to the top rope and Big E catches him.

Sin Cara lands a couple kicks, but Big E catches him again and finishes him off with the Big Ending for the win.
Commercial

When we return, we see a long, creepy Wyatt family video. Bray Wyatt sometimes reminds me of the cult leader I always knew I could be.

Renee Young interviews Kaitlyn and her friends Layla. Kaitlyn has a match tonight for the Divas title with AJ. Layla butts in to say that Kaitlyn is the most dedicated Diva she has ever seen in all her years in this division and gives her a big hug.

Kaitlyn is flattered and hugs her back. They seem so happy together, like best friends. It was really sweet, beautiful even. So now we all know Kaitlyn is getting betrayed and screwed over later tonight by Layla. Should be fun.

Alberto Del Rio enters Vickie’s office to complain about not being allowed to pick his opponent. Vickie and Alberto are interrupted by Raw GM and former junior partner of “Team Brickie” Brad Maddox. Vickie seems annoyed to see Brad, as does Alberto. Alberto asks why he’s here, and Brad tells him because he’s the Raw GM, and reminds Alberto that he will be under Brad’s authority on Monday. Alberto leaves chastened.

Match #3: Fandango versus CM Punk.

Alex Riley is on commentary tonight, and he didn’t even TRY to pronounce Fandango’s name correctly. He didn’t get caught up on the Ns like so many people do, but he was supposed to breathe IN the vowels and he did NOT. He was breathing them out and the accent was all wrong; it almost sounded hillbilly. I only hope Fandango doesn’t hear about this after the show, he’ll be devastated.

Punk starts the match off hot, landing a series of strikes, a bodyslam, and alternating punches and chops. Punk takes Fandango down and puts him in a headlock. Fandango reverses it and puts Punk in a headlock. Fandango knocks Punk down with a shoulder block.

Punk charges but Fandango leapfrogs him in flamboyant fashion. Punk lands a kick and an elbow, Fandango responds by tripping Punk into the ropes. Punk lands a couple punches and a heel kick. Fandango rolls to the floor.

Commercial

Summer Rae distracts Punk outside the ring, and Fandango whips Punk into the steel steps. Fandango rolls Punk into the ring and pummels him. Fandango whips Punk hard into the corner, takes his time and then whips him into another corner. Fandango lands a couple punches and an elbow to the face.

Fandango lands a clothesline and then hits Punk with a boot to the face. Fandango lands a clothesline; Punk retaliates with a series of elbows and forearm shots. Fandango lands a boot to the face. Fandango goes to the top rope and misses with a knee drop.

Punk hits Fandango with an elbow and a neckbreaker. Punk hits Fandango with a running high knee to the head and then climbs to the top rope. Fandango rolls to the floor to regroup. Fandango re-enters the ring and hits Punk with a Mitchinoku driver. Fandango climbs to the top rope but Punk cuts him off. Punk hits Fandango with a superplex, floats over and instead of going for a pin locks in the Anaconda vice. Fandango taps, CM Punk wins!

After the match, Renee Young interviews RVD. RVD predicts victory in his match tonight. Christian interrupts to predict victory for himself, and Randy Orton interrupts to say he’ll not only win, he may go on to become World Champ AND WWE champ. RVD interrupts Randy to remind us that this was supposed to be his interview, and predicts victory.

Commercial

Match #4: Kaitlyn with Layla versus AJ.

AJ starts off punching wildly, Kaitlyn catches her and slams her into the corner. Kaitlyn hits AJ with a couple shoulder blocks and a clothesline. AJ twists Kaitlyn’s arm and forces her to the mat. AJ applies a sleeper and takes Kaitlyn to the mat.

Kaitlyn down and then parades around the ring. AJ lands a kick and Kaitlyn responds with a dropkick. Kaitlyn hoists AJ up on her back and hits her with a knee to the gut. AJ rolls out to the floor and Kaitlyn pursues. Kaitlyn slams AJ into the security barrier but then gets cut off by her friend Layla.

Kaitlyn stands there shocked as Layla stares her down. AJ takes advantage of the distraction and slams into Kaitlyn, flattening her. AJ rolls Kaitlyn into the ring and applies the Black Widow submission hold. Kaitlyn taps, AJ retains her title. After the match, AJ and Layla skip around the ring holding hands, and then hug on the entrance ramp.

Commercial

Match #5: RVD versus Christian versus Randy Orton.

Alberto Del Rio joins us on commentary. He’s still upset he isn’t going to be allowed to defend his title against his ring announcer Ricardo, who Alberto insists could beat RVD, Christian or Orton. The match starts off with all three men exchanging strikes.

Christian throws Orton to the floor but then gets hit with an elbow and a kick from Van Dam. Orton trips RVD and pulls him to the floor. RVD slams Orton gut first onto the security barrier and then climbs up to the ring apron. RVD hits Orton with a spinning kick from the edge of the ring. Christian spears RVD outside the ring.

Commercial

Christian hits RVD with a couple strikes and then plants him with a tornado DDT. Orton reenters the ring and hits Christian with a pair of European uppercuts. Christian jumps to the floor and misses with a punch. Orton hits RVD with a Thesz press and then Christian goes to the top rope. Orton and Christian exchange punches and Orton hits Christian with a headbutt.

Orton takes Christian down with a superplex from the top rope and gets a two count. Both men appear hurt. RVD hits Christian and Orton with clotheslines, then hits each of them with a spin kick. RVD hits Orton with a split legged moonsault for 2. RVD hits Orton with a couple shoulder blocks in the corner.

RVD charges at Orton in the corner again but Orton gets his legs up and knocks RVD down; RVD rolls to the floor. Orton tries to hit Christian with a rope hung DDT, but Christian backdrops Orton to the floor instead. Christian hits RVD with a baseball slide dropkick, and then bodyslams Orton.

RVD bodyslams Christian and then enters the ring. RVD flies out of the ring over the top rope and takes out Christian and Orton at the same time.
Commercial

When we return, Christian and Orton are exchanging strikes and pin attempts. Christian hits Orton with a reverse DDT and then knocks RVD off the edge of the ring apron. Christian tries to spear Orton but Orton leapfrogs out of the way.

Christian climbs to the second rope and hits Orton with a back elbow. Christian tries to hit Orton with the Kill Switch but Van Dam hits a flying kick from the top rope that misses Christian but hits Orton. RVD hits Christian with a pair of kicks and then hits him with the 5 star frog splash from the top rope! RVD goes for a cover but it’s broken up by Orton.

Orton lands punches to RVD and then hits him with a clothesline. RVD hits Orton with a kick and attempts Rolling Thunder, but Orton counters it with a scoop slam. Orton tries to hit RVD with a rope hung DDT, but RVD blocks it. Orton hits Van Dam with a dropkick that sends him out to the floor.

Orton hits Christian with a rope hung DDT and then sets up for the RKO. RVD reenters the ring and Orton RKO’s him instead of Christian. Christian takes Orton down with a back slide and pins him for the win! Christian is now the #1 contender and has earned One More Match for the World title.

After the match, a disappointed Randy Orton extends his hand to Christian in congratulations and they shake hands in a show or mutual respect. Josh Matthews enters the ring to interview Christian, Christian is glad to have 1 more match, but he’s kind of hurting now.

Just then, Alberto Del Rio blindsides Christian and knocks him down. Alberto knocks Christian out with a superkick to the face and then stands triumphantly over his unconscious body as SmackDown goes off the air.

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