Monday Night Raw TV Report for 05/13/2013
Tonight is just six nights before Extreme Rules! We know most of the matches and their respective stipulations, so all that’s left is one final push. That will happen for sure in three segments, with Brock Lesnar and Triple H face-to-face, and … The other hot rivalry already featured will be a “Dance-Off” between Chris Jericho and his female companion against Fandango and his woman partner. Like I said last week, this typically waste-of-time-segment should be actually entertaining!
And what will be the fate of World Heavyweight Champion, “The Show Off” Dolph Ziggler with his recent serious concussion injury. Can he still compete, or will they play it safe and change the match? Either way, I hope they don’t strip him of the World Title.
Plus, as usual at the end of this report, I will give my predictions for the upcoming pay-per-view. All this and much more for Raw, so read on!
Monday Night Raw TV Report for May 13th, 2013 – “Limits Pushed To The…EXTREME!”
Introduction Segment: Recap
A montage of the events with Ryback and “The Shield” from last week’s Raw is aired, as well as footage of Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman brutalizing Triple H’s offices. It is speculated on what will happen tonight.
Segment #1: Dance-Off – Fandango and Summer Rae VS. “Y2J” Chris Jericho and Edyta Sliwinska
Jerry “The King” Lawler welcomes us to Monday Night Raw, and is standing in the ring, although the canvas is covered in hardwood. Yes, after a clip of Fandango beating Chris Jericho at Wrestlemania XXIX is shown, Lawler brings out the four for their competition
After going over the rules, Lawler points out that Fandango already lost a dance-off to The Great Khali, but Fandango dismisses this as that crowd not knowing talent then. He says that these fans may not like him, but they do have to respect his performance as an artist. “As long as there’s a Chris Jericho, there will be a better man. And his name is Fan-dan-go,” he declares.
“The King” asks for “Y2J’s” response, and Jericho retorts with “Raw is Jericho!” He touts his previous entertainment success in the ring, winning acts like the Musical Chairs from a July 2004 Raw (in Winnipeg to-boot) and conquering Bob Barker’s “Price Is Raw.” Jericho proclaims that “this Sunday at Extreme Rules, I’m going to dance all over your face baby. And you will never, ever, never, e-e-e-ever be the same again!”
An earlier coin toss determined that Fandango will begin. He stalls for a bit, then takes the microphone. Fandango hushes the crowd and demands for silence to create his “masterpiece.” He starts off well, but then spins Summer and she falls. He orders her to “stop messing around.” Edyta checks on Rae and Fandango wants her to get away quickly. Trainers now check on the downed blonde.
Jericho is also looking on, and then Fandango suddenly kicks him down and punches away. He boots him out of the ring and slams hi against the announce table, then throws him into the steel steps. Fandango takes a piece of the hardwood and runs it into Jericho’s face, knocking him out on the floor. He climbs back in the ring and looks at Summer. It was a ruse all along, as she smiles and gets up easily. They pose in a provocative dance position, then exit.
Later tonight, it will be “The Shield” taking on Tag-Team Champions “Team Hell No” and WWE Champion John Cena in a 6-Man Elimination Tag-Team match. Up next, the number one contender to the WWE Title, Ryback, will be in action!
Match #1: Single – “Long Island Iced-Z” Zack Ryder VS. Ryback
Ryback is all over Ryder with kicks and hammering clubs to his back. He pushes Zack off the ropes to the mat and then clotheslines him. Ryback quickly picks him up and gives him the Shell-Shock for the oh-so-quick victory!
Winner via Pinfall: Ryback
Match #2: Tag-Team – “The Primetime Players” (Darren Young and Titus O’Neil) VS. “Tons Of Funk” (Sweet T. and “The Funkasaurus” Brodus Clay) (with “The Funkadactyls” Naomi and Cameron)
Darren and Sweet start out, with T controlling until O’Neil gets the tag. Sweet manages to switch with Brodus and he takes out the big-man with a T-Bone suplex and running corner splash. Young jabs Clay with his comb, allowing Titus to roll him up for the 1 – 2 – 3!
Winners via Pinfall: “The Primetime Players” (Darren Young and Titus O’Neil)
Up next, Smackdown Senior Advisor Theodore Long will make a statement regarding the World Heavyweight Championship!
Segment #2: Arena Promo
Teddy Long is out on the stage with fellow announcer Matt Striker. Before he can give a statement, Jack Swagger, Zeb Colter, Big E. Langston, and A.J. all walk out and argue to make their case for the World Championship. Long finally says that Dolph Ziggler will NOT be stripped of his World Title (yay!) and instead, Swagger will take on Del Rio at Extreme Rules in an “I Quit” match.
The winner will be the #1 Contender. He also says that Big E. will take on either Alberto or Jack, depending on who the WWE fans choose.
Later, Mark Henry will call out Sheamus.
Match #3: Single – United States Champion Kofi Kingston VS. “The Intellectual Saviour Of The Masses” Damien Sandow (Non-Title)
Prior to the bout, it is made known that Kofi will defend his title at Extreme Rules against “The Shield’s” Dean Ambrose. Kofi tries to end this one early with a roll-up but Sandow gets out of it. He runs right back him with a knee-to-the-gut and takes firm control.
Sandow continues to knee him, then drops down with a side Russian legsweep and the “Elbow Of Distain.” He clamps on an abdominal stretch, but Kingston reverses it. He drop toeholds Damien into the second turnbuckle and chops him down a couple times. Kofi flies around with a dropkick and forearms, then nails the Boom Drop double-legdrop, however he misses a springboard crossbody.
Damien capitalizes with a swinging neckbreaker for two, but gets knocked out quickly with the Trouble In Paradise spin-kick for the W by Kofi!
Winner via Pinfall: United States Champion Kofi Kingston
Up next, Mark Henry wants to induct Sheamus into the “Hall Of Pain.”
Segment #3: Arena Promo
As “The World’s Strongest Man” comes out, a clip of John Bradshaw Layfield and the late-great Eddie Guerrero’s WWE Championship “Four-Corners Bull-Rope” match from June 27th, 2004 at the Great American Bash is shown to display the idea of the upcoming bout between Sheamus and Henry.
Josh Matthews is in the ring and airs what happened last week, with Henry whipping the heck out of Sheamus. “The World’s Strongest Man” is happy with that and Friday’s Smackdown record-breaking pulling of two semi-trailers. Matthews asks Henry how he will defeat Sheamus on Sunday, but Mark just want to show him.
He orders Josh to put he strap on, and Henry hooks himself too. He shoves Matthews down and drags him around as he touches all four corners, the goal of the match. He rolls Josh out of the ring and challenges Sheamus to do it tonight.
Sheamus does not show up and Henry gloats. However, the Irishman does answer the call. Sheamus says that he has never backed down from a fight and marches to the ring. Henry doesn’t let him in, so Sheamus searches under the ring and pulls out a strap of his own. The two whip each other, and Sheamus gets the better, sending Henry up the ramp wincing in pain.
A clip from January 28th is aired of Brock Lesnar assaulting WWE Chairman Vince McMahon is shown, to emphasize the feud between he and Triple H.
Match #4: Single – Antonio Cesaro VS. “The Viper” Randy Orton
An elbow/collar tie-up between the two begins and they both break. Cesaro locks Orton in a side headlock and shoves him down with a shoulder block. Orton leapfrogs a running Antonio and drops him with an elbow. Cesaro pushes against Randy in the corner and headbutts him.
He stomps away at him, then runs with an uppercut for a two-count. Antonio clutches on a grounding rear chinlock, but Orton fights out and tosses him over with a suplex. Orton kicks back and clotheslines, then catches Cesaro off the ropes with a powerslam. He tries to set up Cesaro with the slingshot-DDT, but Antonio wiggles out into a roll-up for a nearfall, but then Randy quickly plants him with the R.K.O. to finish this one!
Winner via Pinfall: “The Viper” Randy Orton
Match #5: Single – Heath Slater (with 3.M.B. partners Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal) VS. “The Awesome One” The Miz
(Happy for one return, and sad for the other! I think you can figure the order out!), Miz looks awesome (pardon the pun) as he controls most of this bout, until he gets yanked from outside. Slater takes advantage and gains his own momentum.
He tries to wear Miz down with a rear chinlock, but Miz battles out and boots him in the face. Miz 9-punches Heath in the corner, then throws him onto his partners. Back in the ring, Miz low-dropkicks him then locks in the Figure-4 for the tap-out!
Winner via Submission: “The Awesome One” The Miz
Footage of the Susan G. Komen Foundation for the Cure of Breast Cancer walk airs, as Layla and Alicia Fox participated in Washington.
Up next, (and way too early!), is the 6-Man Elimination Tag!
Match #6: 6-Man Tag-Team Elimination – Tag-Team Champions Team Hell No (Kane and Daniel Bryan) and WWE Champion John Cena VS. The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Roman Reigns) (Non-Titles)
It is also announced that Reigns and Rollins will challenge Bryan and Kane for the Tag-Team Championship at Extreme Rules in a Tag-Team Tornado Match. (All competitors are in the ring at once)
Kane starts out with Ambrose and he grabs Dean in a wristlock. He runs off the ropes and shoulder blocks Dean, then gives him a headlock takedown. Kane puts Ambrose into his corner and tags in Daniel, who delivers repeated kicks to the chants of “yes.”
Daniel holds Ambrose down in an armlock, but Ambrose gets out and switches with Rollins. To the delight of fans, Cena is tagged in and grounds Rollins with a bulldog and front facelock.
Back live, Bryan is in again and has Ambrose locked in a unique surfboard submission. Bryan slaps hands with Kane, who comes in and front-dropkicks Dean. Kane switches back with Daniel, but he quickly gets shoved into The Shield’s corner. They take over and it is mainly Reigns who dominates over Bryan.
Rollins holds him as Ambrose comes in and jabs away. Dean fiercely stomps on Bryan’s stomach, but soon gets a knee-to-the-gut from Daniel! He manages to tag in his partner and Kane is on fire (no pun intended), taking out all three “Shield” members. He plants Ambrose with a DDT for a close fall, then flies off the top rope with a clothesline!
Kane grabs Ambrose by the throat, as well as Rollins and runs them out of the ring. On the outside, Kane uses the barricade, steel steps, and announce table to dismantle The Shield. He does get so hot, that in slamming Ambrose with the top of the commentator’s table, Kane gets himself DQ’d.
Elimination #1: Kane via Disqualification
Back live, Ambrose drops Cena with a DDT and a nearfall! He tags in Reigns, who measures up the WWE Champion and comes at him with a jumping forearm. 1 – 2 – Cena kicks out. John reverses a suplex attempt into one of his own, but Reigns ended up in his own corner, so Seth was able to come in quickly. He dives off the turnbuckle with a knee-to-the-head for two!
Rollins clutches a rear naked choke on, and Cena manages to struggle to his feet and walk over to an anticipated Bryan. He gets the tag and Bryan double-front-dropkicks Ambrose and Reigns off the apron! He ducks Rollins and hits a suicide dive on Reigns, then nails Rollins with a front-missile-dropkick! 1 – 2 – Rollins kicks out!
He tries for the “No Lock” crossface, but Ambrose gets the tag as Rollins is whipped off the ropes. Dean plants Daniel with the bulldog/DDT combo for the 1 – 2 – 3!
Elimination #2: Daniel Bryan via Pinfall
The fans cheer on Cena as he faces the insurmountable odds of 3 – 1 against The Shield. Like vultures, the trio attack, but the WWE Champion fights back. He hits a couple of diving shoulder tackles and a spin-out backdrop on Rollins. He takes out Ambrose and Reigns, then gives the Attitude Adjustment to send Rollins to the back.
Elimination #3: Seth Rollins via Pinfall
Cena has Dean on his shoulders quickly for the A.A., but Ambrose held onto the ropes. Reigns interferes, shoving referee Mike Chioda then spearing John. Chioda calls for a DQ on Roman for this move.
Elimination #4: Roman Reigns via Disqualification
Ambrose covers but only receives two! Cena soon catches him in the STF, but Reigns and Rollins jump in and attack again, causing another dq.
Elimination #5: Dean Ambrose via Disqualification
Winners via Elimination: Tag-Team Champions Team Hell No (Daniel Bryan and Kane) and WWE Champion John Cena
Post-match, The Shield triple-powerbomb Cena, stand over him, then walk off. As Cena is laid out, his challenger takes advantage. Ryback smashes a chair over his injured ankle and shouts “Ryback Rules” from the top of the ramp.
Up next, Big E. will face either Jack Swagger or Alberto Del Rio.
Still photos of Triple H and Brock Lesnar’s rematch at Wrestlemania XXIX are shown, with a reminder of their face-to-face later tonight.
Match #7: Single – Big E. Langston (with A.J. Lee) VS. “A Real American” Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter)
The WWE fans had vote overwhelmingly for Langston, 65% – 35%! Both big men lock up and go nowhere. Swagger gets a headlock takedown, but Langston is immediately up and neither can shove the other down. They stared down and Langston takes control. He hits a few clubs, but misses a running splash in the corner. He does shove off a Patriot Lock ankle lock though, but gets suplex by Swagger.
Back live, Langston gives Jack a fallaway backbreaker for two. He rams his shoulder into Jack’s stomach, but misses another run, and ends up shoulder-first against the post. Swagger takes advantage with the Swaggerbomb for two! Langston gets his momentum again, suplexing Jack from the top rope! 1 – 2 – Swagger manages to get out!
Big E. picks up Swagger for his finisher, but Jack drops out the back and chops him down. He grasps on the ankle lock, and Langston fights to the bottom rope, forcing a break! Langston tosses Swagger to the outside and into the barricade. As he sizes up Swagger, he runs but misses, and ends up on the other side of the wall into the crowd! Referee Scott Armstrong counts to 10 and it’s over!
Winner via Count-Out: “A Real American” Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter)
Post-match, Alberto Del Rio runs down and attacks Swagger, but Big E. comes in. They both take him out, then Del Rio clotheslines Swagger to the floor, where Langston is laying too. Alberto is in the ring alone and cheers with his friend, Ricardo Rodriguez.
It is announced that The Miz will take on Cody Rhodes at the pre-show for Extreme Rules.
Match #8: Single – A.J. Lee VS. Natalya (with The Great Khali and Hornswaggle)
(Note: The Bella Twins [Brie and Nikki] and Divas Champion Kaitlyn join for commentary.) A.J. plays games and skips around at first, but Natalya manages to catch her in a waistlock takedown. She shoves picks her up and runs her into the corner.
Lee escapes the ring and slaps A.J. as Natalya chases after. A.J. blows a kiss to Kaitlyn from the apron, but that distraction allows Natalya to push her down. Back in the ring, A.J. reverses a sidewalk pickup into the “Black Widow,” an octopus abdominal stretch hold for the tapout!
Winner via Submission: A.J. Lee
Segment #4: Backstage Promo
Chris Jericho is questioned by Matt Striker if he felt foolish by Fandango’s actions at the “dance-off.” Jericho says he was distracted by trying to play games with him, however all that stops now. Jericho says that he is a 6-time World Champion and his name is Chris Jericho! “Y2J” asserts that he will teach Fandango “how to dance Chris Jericho style!”
Segment #5: Arena Promo
Triple H is back and prepares to face off with Brock Lesnar! He makes his entrance to the ring and the Steel Cage above the ring (which honestly, I did not notice at all throughout the show!) begins to lower!
“The Game” is now surrounded by the steel mesh walls. He and Lesnar have been at war for almost a year with broken bones and blood, but nothing has been settled. That will all be change this Sunday. HHH cites the ring as his home, as he grew up here, learned to be a man, and learned to fight there.
He says that a man who he respected once told him that he had to hate, and Triple H did just that. He excelled on it, and he felt no more at home than when he was in the ring enclosed in the steel. “Brock Lesnar, you’re here. I’m here. They’re (fans) here. And more importantly, the steel is here. So I’m at home. Why don’t you come and try to take it?”
“The Beast Incarnate” answers the challenge and proceeds out with Paul Heyman, however only to the top of the stage. Heyman stops them and starts to introduce themselves, but is immediately cut off by Triple H. He orders Brock to come on down and “do this,” but Paul E. gets back on the stick.
He says that HHH gets his “perverse pleasure” from the “hate,” but Heyman gets his from seeing the two “hate” each other. He calls Lesnar a “cage-fighting carnivore” and Triple H “the biggest slab of meat in the WWE Universe.”
Paul E. declares that Triple H will “hate” facing his family after “Brock leaves you beaten and battered and disfigured in the cage.” HHH will “hate” facing his father-in-law, because he let down the WWE Universe. “One man will emerge from this war the winner (points to Lesnar), and here’s something you never had to face in your career.
One man (points to Triple H) is going to have to face the fact that he will go down in history as the ‘loser.’ And you Triple H will go down in history as the ‘loser,’ and I cannot imagine how much you’re going to ‘hate’ that. Now my client, Brock Lesnar, is here tonight, on Monday Night Raw, and he is ready for a fight! A fight that you’re going to have to wait ’till Sunday to experience, because you as the C.O.O. of WWE, know better than anyone else, that my client Brock Lesnar does not … fight … for … free.”
They begin to walk off, but Triple H calls them back. He has always wondered why Brock won’t face him “like a man.” HHH realized the truth is that Heyman can’t afford him to do that. “The Game” reminds them that he did the “unthinkable,” he knocked Lesnar out cold and beat him.
They know if Brock were to get his butt kicked in the cage, that it won’t go over well for Heyman the business men, much like Sunday if that happens too. HHH calls that his “mystique” going away and Heyman’s “meal ticket” existing no longer.
“The Cerebral Assassin” gives Lesnar two choices: “are you going to walk down that isle and step into this ring, and try and prove to the world that you are ‘Brock Lesnar, the beast!’ Or are you just going to stand up at the top of the ramp, looking for Heyman to tell you what to do, and prove to the world that you are ‘Brock Lesnar, the bitch!’”
Lesnar starts walking down the ramp and referees smartly get out of the way, all the while Heyman tries to convince him otherwise. He slowly ascends the steel steps and enters. He and Triple H glare at each other, then engage in a hard-hitting brawl.
Brock German suplexes HHH, but he misses a dive and ends up face-first in the steel cage wall. Triple H hurls Lesnar against the door, strong enough to send him to the floor and knock down Heyman! HHH wants more as Lesnar gets up. He collects a wincing Heyman and they walk to the top of the ramp, as Triple H walks around the ring inside the cage to close the show.
End Of Raw.
Reporter’s Rumblings – By Moe Tapp
Excellence: Absolutely #1 is Dolph Ziggler still being World Heavyweight Champion! I’m not sure how long he will be out of action, but I’m really glad they didn’t use it as an excuse to strip him of the title. I like the switch too for the #1 Contender bout, and this could also put an end to the rivalry of Del Rio and Swagger – it’s time to move on, and I like Del Rio VS. Ziggler for a fresh feud. Also, Big E. and Swagger was an awesome “power-game/strength” match tonight. Love how Langston “stalked” Jack with a smile on the outside for the finish.
Great wrestling between Kingston/Sandow, Cesaro/Orton, and the 6-Man Tag. Henry’s promo was awesome! He is mean, aggressive, and actually has some personality and “umph” now in his voice. They are keeping his storyline with Sheamus fresh with the different scenarios too.
The ending segment – very old school and loved the passion in Triple H’s voice about growing up in the ring and making his living/career doing what he did. The brawl was also took me back to the days of two men fighting it out for “pride” and hype me the most for this match, more so than all the video package recaps of their feud that was aired leading up to the confrontation.
Bogus: The opening – Jericho/Fandango dance-off could’ve been much more and an actual entertaining dance-off. Plus, I think it should’ve been built up more and presented later in the show, not just jumping right into it. I was greatly disappointed. Ryback squashing Ryder was pointless – we get that he’s a “monster” and “unbeatable,” so don’t need to show it all the time. Why are “3.M.B” still together – them getting taken out and torn apart by “The Shield” should’ve been the end of that failing trio. Speaking of “The Shield,” hated that “Super Cena” took out two-thirds of them in the match. I feel this hurt the group’s unstoppable reputation, especially since Cena is hurt with an injury. They can (and hopefully will) rebound by winning all the Championships they are challenging for on Sunday. This also should’ve been the main-event!
“Primetime Players”/”Tons Of Funk” was just filler. I wanted matches like Damien/Kofi and Antonio/Randy to be longer, like last week. Natalya/A.J. could’ve been a much better match, had it been longer and not for the pointless commentary by the Divas Champ Kaitlyn and The Bellas – that was bad! Love A.J.’s potentially new finisher though, very cool!
Predictions: Alberto Del Rio will become the Number 1 Contender, John Cena will somehow put down Ryback to retain the WWE Championship (too soon for him to lose it), “The Shield” will gain the Tag-Team Titles and U.S. Championship. Triple H will defeat Lesnar to end the rivalry – honestly, hopefully they allow blood to enhance the brutality of this match. Henry should continue to look strong and go over Sheamus. Jericho will become almost-heelish again, get more aggressive, and win against Fandango to continue their storyline. Same with Orton over Show, even though I really don’t care about their mini-feud.
All in all, an average-to-low average Raw for the “go-home show,” but the 6-man, the switch of the World Title match, and the ending to Raw all made up for it. Here’s hoping my predictions are correct and in for some more surprises next Monday night! Until then, as always, Be Excellent Wrestling-Online Readers and Wrestling Fans!